Chapter 40
“First, I’ll try putting in my magic.”
“Ah, yes.”
I rolled my eyes around a bit, then cautiously lowered my eyelids.
‘Something’s coming in.’
Starting from my tightly clasped fingers, I could feel a kind of energy pushing in.
It didn’t feel cool like when receiving Master’s magic. Just a feeling of something filling in? Filling an empty space?
‘Ah, okay. I get it.’
Master’s magic had felt cold because my natural magic and Master’s magic were inherently different. Like how we feel warmth differently due to temperature.
‘This man’s magic… is compatible with me. That’s why I don’t feel anything!’
There was no strange sensation at all. It felt as if it was my own magic, naturally accumulating in my body.
“…How is it?”
“A huge amount of magic has come in! Much more than before!”
I was briefly excited at the thought that Lionel’s magic reservoir was much larger than I expected.
But the moment he let go of my hand, I could feel magic leaking out like water from a cracked vessel.
‘No, my magic…!’
I stomped my foot in frustration, but Lionel calmly nodded beside me.
“So it seems this way was okay after all.”
“Eh? This way?”
Was there another way to transmit magic?
“Last time, when you accepted the magic, you collapsed, didn’t you?”
“Ah, yes, that happened.”
I had gotten sick once when I was little, but since then I had been healthy, so there was no sudden reason to collapse.
Probably, I collapsed back then because I received too much magic at once.
“Oh, so did you figure out a way for me to accept magic without collapsing?”
Lionel nodded.
“We already knew our magic types were compatible. I thought this method would be safer.”
Wow… He had deliberately practiced slowly letting the magic flow so I wouldn’t faint after taking in a large amount at once!
‘This is really touching.’
Even wizards can’t easily control magic flow like this. And he practiced it for me despite his busy schedule.
“All the effort of baking cookies for me was worth it…”
“Eh?”
“Ah, it’s nothing.”
I cleared my throat and reached out my hand to Lionel.
“The magic leaking out a bit feels like a waste. Can I hold your hand until we get home?”
Lionel quietly held my hand, interlacing fingers again.
His fingers pressed over mine like a hug, and I wondered if this was really necessary…
‘Ah, this increases contact area.’
Before, when I held his gloved arm, I couldn’t receive magic. So it seemed that bare skin contact was necessary…
‘This is probably the best way.’
We hadn’t known each other long, and though engaged, we were both still minors. Hmph.
“Is it hot?”
“Eh? …No! Not really!”
When Lionel relaxed his grip, I instinctively shook my head and realized my cheeks were burning. He had probably asked because my face was red.
“Just a little, um… hehe.”
I couldn’t exactly say I imagined something more intimate than holding hands, so I just laughed lightly.
Fortunately, Lionel didn’t question why my face was red.
I looked at his straight, tightly closed red lips, then turned my head the other way.
‘Ugh, the heat isn’t going away. It’s hot, hot.’
Somehow, I felt sweat inside the interlaced hands, so I cautiously opened the carriage window.
“The wind is chilly.”
“Not at all. I’m fine, stop being overprotective.”
“It’s not overprotective…”
“Ahhh, I can’t hear a thing. Can’t hear anything.”
I held Lionel’s hand tight so he couldn’t close the window, facing the wind.
My hair fluttered in the cool evening air dyed crimson by the sunset, brushing my neck.
I wanted to scratch my neck with my nails, but held back.
If I moved, Lionel would notice, and my red face would give me away even in the cold wind.
“Ah, by the way, how long will this volunteer work last?”
“I don’t know either.”
“If you don’t know, who does?”
“The Empress would know.”
“……”
If the Empress orders, do we have to obey?
The words rose in my throat, but I didn’t say them.
Of course, the Empress outranked the prince and was also his mother.
Everyone in the empire knew she treated the Second Prince coldly, but even so, Lionel was human—he couldn’t completely detach his feelings toward his mother.
“Do you… not dislike the Empress?”
“Are you asking about me?”
“…No?”
Lionel tilted his head slightly, thinking, then answered:
“No.”
“Really?”
“Yes.”
I fidgeted with our interlaced fingers and asked again.
“Then, you don’t resent her… or anything?”
“No.”
“Really?”
“I don’t feel anything at all.”
I was surprised at such an answer and fell silent.
My first impression of him had been correct: an empty, emotionless doll shaped by resignation.
“Uh…”
I wanted to ask about my feelings toward the First Prince, but stopped.
If I told him I felt indifferent, it might feel weird.
‘Shouldn’t I at least feel angry at the First Prince?’
He had taken everything, even killed the bird I cared for as a child.
“Do you have any other questions?”
“Uh, well…”
He seemed to notice I hesitated to ask about the First Prince. I shook my head as if it was nothing, but impulsively spoke.
“Then, what do I feel?”
Lionel’s eyes widened slightly, as if surprised by the question. I quickly added:
“No, I mean, we’re engaged, and we’ll spend our lives together, um…”
“We’ll be together, bickering and sleeping in the same room for life, right?”
“Exactly! Even though we just met, in the future we’ll be like that. If you have no feelings now, it feels a bit… off.”
Lionel stroked his chin with his free hand.
His expression didn’t change much, but he seemed to be thinking, “Hmm, maybe so.” I got frustrated and blurted out:
“Do you really have no feelings? I baked you so many cookies, and now we’re holding hands too?”
“……”
“And we’re interlacing fingers, not just holding hands?”
I lifted our interlaced hands and shook them near his face, like threatening with a fist.
But Lionel, showing no emotion, suddenly raised his other hand.
I flinched in surprise, and his hand froze in the air for a few seconds.
Then, staring into my eyes, Lionel slowly, very slowly, reached toward me.
Like approaching a wary small animal, showing he meant no harm, I only moved my eyes to watch.
Finally, his hand was about to touch my cheek.
‘Huh? Uh uh uh?’
For a moment, I thought he would grab my cheek and kiss me, and I instinctively shut my eyes tight.